Very Very Valentine – 10 Points

When florist Helen, played by Danica McKellar, meets a dreamy mystery man, played by Damon Runyon, at a masquerade ball, she and her friend Henry (Cameron Mathison) set out to find him. Cake maker, i reckon, or florist Ding ding florist Who is Henry Ah, the good old contrived...

Valentine’s Again – 12 Points

Katherine endures the worst Valentine’s Day date of her life. On her way home a g*psy casts a magical spell on her. The next morning she soon realizes she’s reliving the day until she finds Mr Right. * Is that a repeat Valentine’s day?  Previous couple now recoupling? Ooops,...

Valentine in the Vineyard – 9 Points

So this is the third instalment in a series I haven’t watched, preceded by Summer in the Vineyard and Autumn in the Vineyard. I was dogsitting for some friends and raiding their movie collection. Why does she have a llama… Not the first thing I thought I’d type Cheeky...

Christmas Movies – Micro Reviews

Christmas with a View Honestly, a bit naff. The couple were already snogging at half an hour in, so then there was another hour of manufactured outrage and wilful misunderstanding before it all came out right. Also, I’m really not sure why her mother was even there?   Holiday...

The Christmas Trap

Kara and Jessie are two teenage girls from very different worlds, but with a little Christmas magic, they find they have much more in common than they imagined. This dad does not look like he’s old enough to be her dad Is she a teen or what? Wow, dead...

Once Upon a Holiday – 7 Points

When a Princess escapes her entourage to explore New York City over Christmas, she meets a young man who shows the beautiful stranger his side of the city. Art is rubbish – you’re not allowed. Aha, the love interest appears Is harry a kid?? How old is this dude?...

A Cinderella Story: Christmas Wish – 12 Points

Despite her vain stepmother and mean stepsisters, an aspiring singer works as an elf at a Christmas tree lot and finds her own holiday miracle.   Oh good Lord this opening sequence is so cheesy oof Oh shit her family is so shit Oh boy, I feel bad for...