Movie Review: Valentine in the Vineyard – 9 Points

So this is the third instalment in a series I haven’t watched, preceded by Summer in the Vineyard and Autumn in the Vineyard. I was dogsitting for some friends and raiding their movie collection.

Why does she have a llama…

Not the first thing I thought I’d type

Cheeky boy aha, they’re already in love

Is he gonna propose by drone

Awww this is pretty cute

Ah, is that why they get down on one knee, so the lady can sink into it!?

Family rivalry, aha there’s the conflict I was expecting

One month until Valentine’s and they’re doing fancy presents

Wait, she’s in school!?!?

Grown up school… aka college

Good for you girl! Aha, she’s finishing college 

Marriage is as incredible as college

Awww she’s sciencing for him, and he’s unsciencing for her, cute

Lasagne night

This is weird. I’m with baby brother her.

Oh shit thunder stealers

Oh shit, big time thunder stealers and Valentine stealers

Awww she has to take the ring off

Who is this actress btw? Why do I recognise her?

Wait, is his brother marrying her sister!? That’s weird

Or vice versa.

They’re gonna not be ready…

Orrrrr our coupl3 are gonna do it and not be ready. Oh lol, they’re joking about.

Significantly older brother lol

Ah, cousin, that’s slightly less weird.

Oh no, dony steal her wedding dress too… oh noooooo

Poor Frankie 


Savage de Luca dad

Uh oh, cracks are appearing

Oh no! It’s gonna say they’re not compatible

Oof observers,l

Oh noes

Also competitive timing seems like a bad addition

Oh dear…

This is bad!

Oh god, not the shelves

Oh no, giving up their own vineyard and wedding location

These guys are such thieves!

Oh no, more tests, that’s a bad idea Nate 

Is mittens the llama?

Oh no, don’t spoil secrets!

Okay good

Also, Caleb? Gale? Galeb?

So is this lexie’s mum? Does that mean Frankie’s parents are dead? Ah, her mum is presumably.. 

Oh my god, these guys

These boys are dumb >_<

Oh shit nate spilled the beans

DON’T steal her cake!!

Oh my god Lexi 

Frankie should have lied

Oh, no, they’re going to wrong spots, both gonna cool, 

Yup, theyre so incompatible.

Oh dear

Ruh roh

Oh gooooood this is so bad

How do you spell Shae 

Oh no shae, don’t make it worse

Oh no, he’s gonna buy her a dog isn’t here

This is more oh noes than a regular romance movie I think.

Galeb, shutup

You doofus

An awkward morning all around

Boys amirite

Did they fib about their compatibility?!?!?!

Good boy Nate

Hahaha I’m not sure ziplining is a good romantic activity

I’m with Frankie, sitting quiet on the actual ground

Are the vines going to bud or not!?!?!

I have a horrible feeling they’re not :/

Oh wait, she does have a mom, where has she been

Awwww Lexi

Valentine’s day mini golf!?! Why is that a thing

Where is the mother!?@?

Go lexi’s mum

…or she is Frankie’s mum. I’m so confused

Double date in junior high, good one Frankie


Always do boys vs girls, especially if you’re having relationship drama.

Oh Frankie…

Awww galeb

Oh no, this is gonna be bad

So bad…

Oh Jesus dropped the ball Nate

Awww Lexi, such a decent gal

Gabe! Pretty sure that’s his name 

Noooooooo not a double wedding

But Lexi, you’re wearing Frankie’s dress!

Oh dear

Are you gonna mention that Lexi is wearing your first pick!?

Ohhhhh, maybe she said “your mom” to Lexi 

Oh Frankie, you’re panicking

I hope so too Nate, I hope so too

Hahaha go mittens!!

Well done gabe for fudging your way through

Nate about to have a breakdown…

Hmmm, I reckon they’re gonna put off the wedding

Or stop panicking about the vines

Or actually panic about the vines

Oh no, they’re gonna have opposite opinions

Yay they passed!

Oh no, dad what are gonna say!?

Aww, cutie pie dad, well done for being gracious

Aww Gabe

Oh no, not a frost :/

What’s gonna happen

Lol Shae 

And awww, she’s lovely 



that’s pretty cute actually.

Did Frankie sleep trying to watch the vines  what a sweetie

Aw good, doing the right thing for them

But now they realise they’re on the same page they were just feeling stressed and pressured

I’m so pleased

Oh, they don’t look totally pleased, I guess it’s a big thing to decide

Some mom wisdom dropping

And some dad wisdom?

Is she just gonna get changed or is she gonna call him???

Hahaha they totally lied XD

Aww they’re all gonna get married

Go oooon get marries!

Seriously, they’re budding within a couple hours!?

Yeah! Get marries!


Frankie’s second dress is better anyway

Awwww gabe and shae

Lol a time joke to finish the story

Just realised “perfect pairing” is a wine joke

OK, so I am definitely gonna have to change my scoring system because I didn’t take into account things like the people already being together. But for now, 9 points – but do watch it.



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